Wednesday, April 23, 2014

I Guess Bankruptcy Is a Touchy Subject in Detroit


Tweeted this last night before the Bruins game. Couple favorites from some friends, whatever.

Then right after we handed Detroit some Fried Octopus in that 3-0 shutout, I get a rush of notifications on my phone.

Let's take a look:

Answer to your question: Everything. Government money (aka taxes) are gonna go towards bailing your ass out of bankruptcy. Quick Q&A with myself:

Q:What's in Detroit? 
A:Joe Lewis Arena. 
Q:And if there's no money, who pays to keep the lights on at the Joe Lewis? 
A: Taxpayers (aka me).
Q: What does bankruptcy have to do with hockey?
A: I don't want to pay for your shitty octopus throwing team to waste our time.

And then we have the Habs fan chiming in from God knows where. Habs fans are literally all over NHL social media. If you follow @NHL on Twitter or facebook, you'll see Habs fans dominate the comment boards. I guess when all you have is crepes and 'ockey, that's how you spend your weekend nights.

First off, I said nothing in my tweet to suggest we won the cup. I know its a long playoff and I have respect for the Red Wings as a team. Also, quit being butthurt about Tuukka shutting your asses out.

Another Habs fan chirping about typical Bruins fans stating facts. I wanna believe that Santa Claus is real but I'm an adult and believe the facts. I'm sure people in Detroit live in a blissful state of mind where they forget about the bankruptcy.


Let me go on record as saying that I would hands down party with the bear dude in the picture. The ice cream, the helmet, and the bear suit are all positive factors. I also can't wear my Bruins jersey to school, because I don't go to school. And I most definitely know who they are playing on most nights since there's this cool new app called "SportsCenter".

In conclusion: Fuck the Habs and Believe it or not: Detroit is Bankrupt.

Oh and this was my only response to these squids:



P.S. Brad Marchand is Thor so I guess the NHL should just pack it up and try again next season.




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